


ex-lovers tiptoe

by rainbowrabblerouser



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Disney World & Disneyland, Engagement, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Friends to Lovers, Honeymoon, Idiots in Love, M/M, Wedding Fluff, idiots to lovers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-26
Updated: 2020-03-26
Packaged: 2021-03-01 04:53:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23329555
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowrabblerouser/pseuds/rainbowrabblerouser
Summary: Jared is in love with Evan, and Evan is a huge dork.
Relationships: Evan Hansen/Jared Kleinman
Comments: 2
Kudos: 43





	ex-lovers tiptoe

“Do you wanna just skip work? Hang out with me? Like old times?”

Jared’s pleas and puppy dog eyes stabbed his heart and plucked at his heartstrings slowly, methodically. No, he wouldn’t fall again.

Or maybe he already has and he never noticed how dark it’s gotten.

Because when he looked into his eyes, he saw a light.

A blinding, heart-wrenching light he wished he wasn’t entranced by, but could never ever resist.

After all this time…

He was still into him.

“Look, I know I got hot. Stop staring, Ev!”

Evan snapped out of it and blushed, then he nodded. 

“Cool, I wanna take you out. I just got a paycheck and I don’t even have a girlfriend to spend it on, so you’re the girlfriend tonight....So, I never asked: top or bottom?”

“Oh, take me to dinner first, Jare,” Evan swooned and put a hand to his forehead.

Jared’s cackle was music to his ears. 

* * *

While the waitress collected the check, Jared obnoxiously asked Evan: “Danny DeVito. Smash or pass?” She wasn’t paid enough to hear shit like this on the hour. 

Their “date” was interesting…

When they returned to Jared’s apartment, Evan protested getting into bed with him, but Jared just shoved him onto it and wrapped them in a blanket. 

“No way am I letting you walk home in the cold.”

“But I live so close! And I move around in my sleep.”

Suddenly, Evan’s yawn mutinied himself and he resigned as he tucked himself closer into Jared, burying his face in a comfy space in his neck.

Jared held him tighter as if he were a big ol’ teddy bear. Evan, clad in Jared’s oversized pajamas–a huge Earth Day shirt (how fitting), Star Wars patterned shorts, and HBO Silicon Valley Pied Piper hoodie– slid his arms snug around his friend and sighed.

“I’m sorry in advance if I kick you,” Evan mumbled into his neck, Jared’s blushing heating them up. Jared couldn’t stand this much longer. He’d implode if he didn’t make a move after all these damn years. Seventeen years, longer than that…

Why weren’t they out of the woods on this? They tiptoed around each other like ex-lovers and yet, Jared had saved his first kiss, first everything for Evan. What good is it to chase after someone who was always behind him? What kind of life is that? 

His first love that never was.

He was pathetic. 

No wonder he had no friends at university. The barista he occasionally ranted to and his therapist did not count apparently. Thanks for nothing, Sherwin and Martha…

Could Evan even love him? 

He had no idea, and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to find out.

“Hey, Ev?” He’s challenging himself like Martha instructed. Here goes nothing.

Evan turned to look at him. His eyes glistened in the moonlight creeping through the curtain. Ugh, why was he so cute?

“Do you wanna do an old game like our old sleepovers?”

Evan recalled their times together before it all went down. Even through their teens, they slept together, playing games, prank-calling, and cuddling close in bed. Truth or Dare is tradition.

“Sure, you go first, Jare.”

“Okay, truth or dare.”

Evan thought about it for a moment. Jared was less cruel when it came to dares, but ruthless in truths. He was feeling brave that night. He did have a first date with his crush of a decade.

“Dare.”

“Hold my hand for the rest of the week. You can let go when you have to go somewhere, but the entire time you’re with me, you gotta.”

Evan sighed in relief. Finally, a dare he liked.

“Sure,” Evan said as he reached out to grasp his hand. “This is nice.”

“Are you going to the reunion?”

Jared scoffed. No way. It’s embarrassing enough he still lives here, but it’s worse he doesn’t even have his Master’s yet and he doesn’t have a spouse either. No fucking way was he setting foot back in that hellhole. 

* * *

Jared set foot over the line in front of the school, Evan holding his hand for his dear life.

“Ev, babe, please, calm down or else I can’t code with this hand anymore.”

“Sorry.”

The cafetorium is still the same except it seems that the basketball team has won a few more championships and the student government now holds Homecoming there. High school was a blur to Jared because of depression and likewise to Evan due to anxiety. 

Jared remembers that time the Gay Straight Alliance president tried to hook up with him under the bleachers, but he was still pissy over Evan so his “vibes were off.” The dude was a stoner. Apparently, Jared’s depression was a boner killer.

They collect their shitty name tags and he heads to the food tables while Evan saves him a seat. 

Jared still could not fathom that he was actually there. Pretending to be Evan’s fiancé. 

Maybe Jared would get his first something tonight, but he doubted it. Evan was still bashful as ever and was probably the type to take things slow. Jared couldn’t do slow anymore. He had slowed his entire world down for this man and he was getting tired of it.

He always knew love would be his downfall, he just never thought that it would be for the guy sitting alone over there fiddling with the centerpieces like a lost, little kid. A thought flew by him for a split second: maybe he’s in love? Maybe he could be loved?

He needed a drink.

Jared walked to the drink table and was met with a familiar face. 

Alana. The girl who let him cry on her shoulder for weeks on end when he and Evan “broke up.” The only one in the world who knew about his crush (besides his diary).

“Jared! What a pleasant surprise! We should get a coffee sometime while I’m in town. I’m headed back to Washington for some Supreme Court Justice stuff, but I can clear a morning for you!”

He smiled. Of course, she was the most successful person here. This town was full of schmucks and boy, was he one of them.

“I’d like that. I have a bit of an Evan problem right now.”

Alana laughed as she poured him a Sprite with some girly alcoholic drink only he would order. “Since when do you DON’T? It’s been five whole years since you and he had that situation! Besides, I saw he was on your arm earlier. What’s with that? Face your fears, Kleinman?”

Jared looked down in shame. Only Alana could effortlessly see through his bravado and take him apart like the psychology graduate she was. 

“Look, I can explain. It’s just so lame to be here alone.”

“I’m here with Zoe and she feels like she may as well be by herself since everything about this place reminds her of her brother. She left early to go sleep at her parents’. I don’t blame her, but you’re not alone, J.”

Jared exhaled. “God, that must suck. Sorry, I’ll definitely hit you up later for brunch. See ya, A.”

He made his way back to the table to find Evan talking with someone. Some guy he didn’t recognize. Jared felt an unusual wave of jealousy hit him. This wasn’t even real…

He shouldn’t...

Evan turned to face him, surprised he was back so soon. “Oh, look there he is! Jared!”

“Yeah, I’m the boyfriend!” Jared made a show of waving his ring. Going full limp wrist with the diamond. He went to Jared. Yup, definitely not planned.

“Fiancé.”

“Er– yeah.”

The mystery guy beamed. “Wow! You guys are the first couple I’ve seen tonight! Congrats!”

Evan smiled and leaned to kiss Jared a chaste peck on the lips, then he grabbed his hand.

Jared gulped out a “thanks” as the guy left.

“Who?”

“President of the Environmental Club. He was at the park I worked at.”

“Cool.”

* * *

  
  


Jared drained them of girly drinks and had to be carried to the car. 

As his dear Evan held him in a bridal carry, he stared at his muscles and swooned. He couldn’t help himself. Since when did sweet Evan work out and become such a hunk?

It slipped out.

“Ev, you’re hot.”

Jared was too wasted to notice his sozzled comments. “Like, really, really, really hot.”

Evan sighed, “Thanks, Jare. Now I need to drive us home. Give me the keys.”

Jared drunkenly swatted his hand away. “No! You have to tell me the password first!”

“We don’t have time for this, Jared. It’s 1am in the morning and you’re too drunk to drive.”

He refused to budge, crossing his arms like a child.

Evan guessed a few “passwords”, then he resorted to brute force, planting a kiss on his lips and holding his neck only deepening it. 

Jared could just cry, but he doesn’t, leaning into the passionate kiss and dropping the keys.

“Can we do it again? Please, Ev! Pleeaaaaaseeeeeee?”

Evan chuckled as he placed Jared into the passenger seat and put his seatbelt on.

“Maybe when you’re sober.”

Jared knocked out immediately after he yelled, “YEAH BOY!”

* * *

  
  


“He needs me!” Jared whispered in his sleep.

Evan overheard it, gasping like he had heard a huge secret. Who was “he”?

He longed to know if it was him. Evan held Jared closer under the sheets and kissed his forehead. Jared got too wasted and he was a handsy drunk, refusing to let Evan go even as they slept. 

“Goodnight, Jare. I love you.”

“Love ya too,” he hears Jared mumble into his collarbone.

Evan gets the best sleep he’s ever had.

* * *

  
  


When he wakes up, Jared feels Evan’s strong arms around him. 

He thanked God it was a Saturday and they could sleep in.

Evan woke up and pulled him closer. “Morning! You’re an interesting drunk, Jare.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s okay. First time for everything.”

Jared flushed, embarrassed by all things he probably said about him. Time to change the subject: “Hey, uh, we never finished our game!”

Evan sighed, “Truth or dare?”

“Truth.”

“Were you jealous of that guy from last night?”

Jared guffawed, “What? That tree-hugger? I know I’m yours, and you know you’re mine…well for the time being…”

“Just answer the question truthfully.”

Jared rolled his eyes, “Maybe a little bit, he was too close.”

“All right, I’ll talk to people a whole ten feet away,” Evan teased. “Starting with you…”

Evan playfully pretends to leave the bed when Jared pulls him back, crashing their lips together.

His real first.

They pulled away and Jared whispered, “I’m sorry…”

Evan held him closer and declared, “I’m not.”

“How long, Ev?”

Evan panicked, “I dunno. Twelve inc–?”

“No, you idiot. I mean years...Also, TWELVE inches?”

They blushed as Evan whispered, “Since forever…”

Jared was incredibly hungover and immensely in love. 

* * *

  
  


Evan squeezed his hand as they approached the gate to the Murphy estate. 

“We can turn back now.”

“No, we need to face our fears, Evan,” Jared reassured him. “They’re just old white people we conned in high school. No big deal, babe.”

“Ugh, fine.”

Dinner isn’t horrible with the Murphys, though they did age like milk. No surprise there.

They get Jared to talk about his big plans to take Amazon down and his big move to California.

Evan figured he'd go with Jared wherever he went. They had parks in California. He could manage a life with him.

He’d do anything for a life with him.

He loves him. He loves him. He loves him.

* * *

Alana was early.

Jared was late.

Business as usual.

“Sorry, A, Ev was keeping me in,” Jared said as he sat down.

“It’s cool. How’s that going? You guys were the talk of the town,” Alana took a sip of her tea.

“Oh, it’s great. I don’t want it to ever end,” Jared holds his left hand up to show off the ring Evan had gotten him. “I love him. A lot.”

“Wow, it must be serious. I’m happy for you.”

Jared fidgeted with the box in his pocket. He had big plans, all right, and they weren’t just ones and zeroes. There was more to life than some numbers on a screen.

“I have a plan and it’s going to blow his mind.”

* * *

Evan returned home to find Jared sprawled on the couch. He had moved into Jared’s place and things were going pretty well. It had been nearly a year since they moved to California.

Dating wasn’t all that different: they still drank iced coffee, screamed Taylor Swift lyrics, and ate lunch together. The only differences were the kisses and the sex. 

  
Those were perks.

“Honey, I’m home!” Evan yells like some husband in a sitcom. Jared was the sassy wife.

“Hey Ev,” Jared called. “Guess who got us a trip to the Redwoods?”

Evan almost screamed. He was obsessed with that forest. It was the one the Ewoks lived in.

They were both huge dorks, so of course, they were excited.

* * *

  
  


“It’s just like the movie! I can’t believe Mark Hamill was here!”

While Evan got distracted by the towering trees, Jared mentally prepared himself as he got down on one knee.

“Ev,” he said. 

He turned around and was rendered speechless.

Evan stepped forward and Jared opened the box.

“You know, this is the nerdiest thing ever. I just really love you, Ev. I had a whole speech, but I didn’t want you to cry in the Return of the Jedi forest. I have loved you since we were kids, Evan Hansen. I have loved you even though you’ve broken my heart and put it back together. You’re all I want. I love you–”

Evan cupped his face and leaned down to kiss him.

“I know.”

Evan kissed him and wouldn’t let go. 

He put the ring on and pushed Jared onto the blanket they set down. 

“Do not tell me we’re gonna fuck in the Ewok forest…”

Evan laughed. “Not the weirdest thing we’ve done.”

  
  


“Vows?”

After Evan’s tearful remarks made everyone cry, Jared was up and his was essentially a stand-up set in comparison. Damn. No way he could top it.

  
“Evan, you know how I feel. These schmucks don’t deserve to hear it. They already have to see our Instagram stories. They know I’m in love with a tree-hugging nerd. I’ve shouted it on rooftops–”

Alana nods. She was there.

“–and I’ve named so many programs after you, the guys at Google want to know what an ‘Evan’ is and when it will launch. I still remember the game of TRUTH OR DARE we played. You asked me for my truth and I just couldn’t contain it. I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember. At this point, Ev, I dare you to marry me.”

Evan was speechless.

* * *

“Thank God we went in early!”

Their honeymoon to Disney World was a success. They had just finished building their $400 lightsabers and slayed the Millenium Falcon ride (Jared drove and Evan shot).

They did the classic kiss in front of the castle photo and had an entire photoshoot in the Tangled restroom area. Jared would curse in front of kids, but Evan wouldn’t even care because he was so happy and so in love.

  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> please comment!
> 
> tumblr: @rainbowrabblerouser


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